Nomadic Ramblings

Just as Abdi sat down to have his Iftar, his phone started to ring. His wife told him to ignore it and continue having his food but he paid her no attention and answered it anyway.

It was a call from Somalia. He could tell by the interference on the line and the loud hello ringing in his ears. It was his childhood friend Ali. As usual, he wanted money. Eid was coming and he claimed to have nobody else to approach for some financial help. It is the month of giving, he said. It is the time when friends remember needy friends and families are charitable to each other. Abdi reluctantly promised to see what he can do but insisted that he was broke and could make no promises. I will try my best, he said.

Sado, Abdi's wife, was sat staring at him and trying to work out who the person on the other side was. She waited until her husband finished his call and then coolly asked him to eat his food.

Abdi: I will, as soon as I finished praying.

Sado: At least you pray! Though I am not sure how good that is when you don't really fast.

Abdi: I did not fast for health reasons. I had an upset stomach.

Sado: Today it was an upset stomach. The day before you claimed to have vomited. The one before that you had bloody gums. The one before that you felt sick and dizzy. There are only five days left and I'm not sure if you'll ever be well enough to fast. But at least you're praying, eh?

Abdi: I know you don't believe me but I was truly sick on all those days. Besides, when I was feeling well, I did fast the first three days. I am not so weak as not to be able to fast, you know. It's just this illness of mine.

Sado: Well, you'll have to make up for them sometime.

Abdi: Or feed some poor people. In fact, this reminds me of the phone call I just got. It was Ali and he needed help with the Eid expenses. I think I am going to send him the money to account for all the days I missed.

Sado: This friend of yours is a waste of space. He's married to three women and yet he phones other people to help him look after his family. If you can't afford it, why marry all these women? I truly despise men that marry two or three.

Abdi: You're a typical Somali woman, always ready to talk behind other people's back. Were you not the one who was just looking down on me for missing a few days due to illness? Where is all the virtue when it comes to talking behind people's back? I mean, you just broke your fast, woman!

Sado: I know. I know. Sorry, but I just can't stand men that marry more than one wife.

Abdi: It is his life. It is his choice. He asked for help and, if I can, I will help him with no preconditions. What do you want me to do? Tell him I'll send him the money only if he divorced two of his wives?

Sado: Don't be silly. I was just making small talk. I really don't care how many wives this friend of yours has. He is not my concern. The only time I would worry about such a thing is if YOU decided to marry a second wife.

Abdi: Where did that come from? Are you looking for an argument, woman?

Sado: No. Again, I was just making small talk.

Abdi: Keep talking that way and I am sure to get me a second wife.

Sado: Now who is looking for an argument?

Abdi: Never mind all that. I am going to pray.

Abdi finishes his prayers and comes to sit down and have a cup of tea.

Sado: Are you angry with me?

Abdi: No. Why should I be angry with you? Like you said, you were making small talk.

Sado: You know how much I hate guys that marry multiple wives and the mention of that friend of yours always gets on my nerves. He lives in poverty yet he is not poor and is probably having a better life than both of us. It doesn't stop him from asking for money though.

Abdi: So it is about the money then? Ok. I will not send him anything if it makes you happy.

Sado: No. No. It is not about the money. Send him whatever you can. After all, it is not the fault of his many wives that he is a good for nothing so and so.

Abdi: Ok. I actually can't send him anything in the next few days and Eid is just round the corner. Do you mind if you go to the xawalad and send him the money yourself? I'll give you all the details, and the money of course.

Sado: No. I don't mind. Just so to prove that I don't begrudge your friend the money.

The next day, Sado goes to the xawlad and tells the man behind the counter to send the money to Ali. She gives him the details and the money Abdi gave her. The xawalad man asks her who should he say the money was from. She gives him her husband's name. The xawalad guy enters the name of the husband in his computer system and turns to Sado asking if her husband ever sent money through this xawalad before. Sado replies in the negative.

The Somali xawalad man who, typically, does not understand nor believe in individual privacy looks shocked and asks her if she's sure.

Sado: Yes. I am sure. My husband never goes to any xawalado. I always do these things for him while he's at work.

Xawalad man: But his name is here. He sends money back home every month.

Sado: Every month? Who to?

Xawalad man: Do you know a lady by the name Nimco Maxamed?

Sado: Never heard of her before!

Xawalad man: Are you sure she's not his sister, mother or aunt?

Sado: I know all his family. There is no Nimco there. Are you sure he sends it EVERY month?

Xawalad man: That's what my system says.

Sado: The cheating, lying, non-fasting so and so!

Xawalad man: Steady now, sister. I presume you're still fasting.

Sado: What fasting are you talking about? MY HUSBAND IS CHEATING ON ME!

Xawalad man: Calm down, sister. Maybe it is a misunderstanding.

Sado: We'll see, we'll see. Cancel the transfer I asked you to make for now. I'll return and make it later.


Abdi did fast the remaining days of Ramadan but all those around him suspected that he only did so as a result of being homeless and not having ready access to a full fridge.