Somaliland Elections
A candidate’s speech.
My fellow Somalilanders, with this extraordinary election, we embark upon a path of fairness, freedom and democracy. Once we were a renegade state, a shambles and a mere dream. Now, we’ve a democratically elected president and are about to elect a democratic parliament. We’re well and truly on the road to nationhood.
My people of Burco North: I am contesting this election with another twenty-five candidates. We’re all fighting for your votes. Hush. We’re all competing for your votes.
My esteemed opponents have all decided to tackle this election with a national mindset. They all speak of political parties, presidential impeachments and international recognition! Beware of their forked tongues and misleading rhetoric.
My cousins, my family and kin. The whole of Somaliland knows of you, the whole of Somaliland respects you and the whole of Somaliland reveres you. Throughout the centuries, the whole of Africa had heard of your heroic deeds. Throughout the years, the entire Somali people had marvelled at your great literature. Your men are great and women pretty. In faith, though our mosques are tiny, they’re packed to the brim with faithful worshippers. In trade, though are businesses are new; they compete with the best of African businesses.
People of Burco North, one can’t fault your hard work and efforts of turning this part of our nation into the great social, financial and political hub that it became. You’ve built the villas, the schools and the hotels with hardly any governmental help. You’ve summoned the aid of our migrant brothers all over the world and used that help to build great hospitals and more schools.
My brothers, unlike my fellow candidates, I believe that it is time the government contributed some money, experience and work into making Burco North a better place. Like all the faithful and patriotic citizens of this great and prosperous land of ours, we’ve been promptly paying our taxes and helping in filling the coffers of the central government. All the while, we had nobody to speak up for us and pass our requests to the powers that be.
My beloved North Burcawis, I hereby declare my candidacy for the post of Burco North MP. I pledge to have your interests at heart and fight for North Burco’s right to share in this nation’s wealth. Why should we not have running water like the people of the capital, allegedly, do? Why shouldn’t the government subsidise our villas like it, allegedly, does with the people of Borama? Why should we not have our cake and eat it like the people of Laas Caanod?
My exploited brothers, we’re no less important than the people of Hargeisa, Borama or Ceereqabow! Even the Southern Burcawis received government assurances (and opposition pledges) to ease their suffering and, allegedly, build a state of the art Ice Rink in the centre of that area! We, my brothers, have been asking for proper and adequate sewer system for years. We offered to help with the cost but our cries and protests were ignored. What, I ask you; will the Southern Burcawis do with an Ice Rink?
My relatives, it’s your duty, responsibility and obligation not to waste your vote on any weak candidates come Election Day. I don’t covet your votes for personal gain, prestige or tribal reasons. I want your votes because, I believe, that I could help alleviate your pain, contribute to your gains and banish the chains; of misery and poverty.
The other candidates are attempting to appeal to your tribal links, heritage and emotions. They aim to divide you, o people of North Burco. I don’t. You are all my brothers (and sisters). You all mean the same to me. I am not like these other candidates that went to canvass in their own neighbourhoods and used the clan politics to secure votes. Yes, North Burco is my neighbourhood and yes my house is round the corner from here. But, no, I am not running on a clannish agenda. These vulgar ideas and this unhealthy politics might work in South Burco, but I have enough respect for you North Burco people to know that you will never fall for any clannish rhetoric. The people of the capital, those of Borama and all those of the various areas of Somaliland might elect their candidates alongside clan and tribe lines, but not the knowledgeable people of North Burco. Never the people of North Burco! Therefore, I come to you with pledges.
Vote for me and I’ll ensure there is hot and cold water in every home
Vote for me and I’ll make certain that North Burco boasts world-class sewers
Vote for me and I’ll guarantee that North Burco has non-stop electricity
Vote for me and I’ll promise to improve the local economy
Vote for me and I’ll pledge to start a drive against illiteracy
Vote for me and I’ll vow that we’ll always be ahead of South Burco
Vote for me and I’ll make sure that North Burco is always at the centre of any national discussion.
Do not waste your votes on self-serving politicians and their puppets. I’m the candidate for you, ilma adeeryaal.
Long live North Burco.
My fellow Somalilanders, with this extraordinary election, we embark upon a path of fairness, freedom and democracy. Once we were a renegade state, a shambles and a mere dream. Now, we’ve a democratically elected president and are about to elect a democratic parliament. We’re well and truly on the road to nationhood.
My people of Burco North: I am contesting this election with another twenty-five candidates. We’re all fighting for your votes. Hush. We’re all competing for your votes.
My esteemed opponents have all decided to tackle this election with a national mindset. They all speak of political parties, presidential impeachments and international recognition! Beware of their forked tongues and misleading rhetoric.
My cousins, my family and kin. The whole of Somaliland knows of you, the whole of Somaliland respects you and the whole of Somaliland reveres you. Throughout the centuries, the whole of Africa had heard of your heroic deeds. Throughout the years, the entire Somali people had marvelled at your great literature. Your men are great and women pretty. In faith, though our mosques are tiny, they’re packed to the brim with faithful worshippers. In trade, though are businesses are new; they compete with the best of African businesses.
People of Burco North, one can’t fault your hard work and efforts of turning this part of our nation into the great social, financial and political hub that it became. You’ve built the villas, the schools and the hotels with hardly any governmental help. You’ve summoned the aid of our migrant brothers all over the world and used that help to build great hospitals and more schools.
My brothers, unlike my fellow candidates, I believe that it is time the government contributed some money, experience and work into making Burco North a better place. Like all the faithful and patriotic citizens of this great and prosperous land of ours, we’ve been promptly paying our taxes and helping in filling the coffers of the central government. All the while, we had nobody to speak up for us and pass our requests to the powers that be.
My beloved North Burcawis, I hereby declare my candidacy for the post of Burco North MP. I pledge to have your interests at heart and fight for North Burco’s right to share in this nation’s wealth. Why should we not have running water like the people of the capital, allegedly, do? Why shouldn’t the government subsidise our villas like it, allegedly, does with the people of Borama? Why should we not have our cake and eat it like the people of Laas Caanod?
My exploited brothers, we’re no less important than the people of Hargeisa, Borama or Ceereqabow! Even the Southern Burcawis received government assurances (and opposition pledges) to ease their suffering and, allegedly, build a state of the art Ice Rink in the centre of that area! We, my brothers, have been asking for proper and adequate sewer system for years. We offered to help with the cost but our cries and protests were ignored. What, I ask you; will the Southern Burcawis do with an Ice Rink?
My relatives, it’s your duty, responsibility and obligation not to waste your vote on any weak candidates come Election Day. I don’t covet your votes for personal gain, prestige or tribal reasons. I want your votes because, I believe, that I could help alleviate your pain, contribute to your gains and banish the chains; of misery and poverty.
The other candidates are attempting to appeal to your tribal links, heritage and emotions. They aim to divide you, o people of North Burco. I don’t. You are all my brothers (and sisters). You all mean the same to me. I am not like these other candidates that went to canvass in their own neighbourhoods and used the clan politics to secure votes. Yes, North Burco is my neighbourhood and yes my house is round the corner from here. But, no, I am not running on a clannish agenda. These vulgar ideas and this unhealthy politics might work in South Burco, but I have enough respect for you North Burco people to know that you will never fall for any clannish rhetoric. The people of the capital, those of Borama and all those of the various areas of Somaliland might elect their candidates alongside clan and tribe lines, but not the knowledgeable people of North Burco. Never the people of North Burco! Therefore, I come to you with pledges.
Vote for me and I’ll ensure there is hot and cold water in every home
Vote for me and I’ll make certain that North Burco boasts world-class sewers
Vote for me and I’ll guarantee that North Burco has non-stop electricity
Vote for me and I’ll promise to improve the local economy
Vote for me and I’ll pledge to start a drive against illiteracy
Vote for me and I’ll vow that we’ll always be ahead of South Burco
Vote for me and I’ll make sure that North Burco is always at the centre of any national discussion.
Do not waste your votes on self-serving politicians and their puppets. I’m the candidate for you, ilma adeeryaal.
Long live North Burco.
