Hurricane Katrina hits the US!
In other news (waxa la yedhi) that the government of his Excellency Abdullahi Yusuf Ahmed have also offered to help the United States in its hour of need.
In a long and elaborate speech delivered to the journalists of the world, the president sought to compare the tragedy besetting America today to the one that’s been crippling Somalia for the past fifteen years.
He started by talking about the chaos, death and despair. He talked about the need for strong leadership and steady resolve. He cleverly contrasted the floods engulfing New Orleans to the flood submerging Somalia (him). He concluded that mischievous comparison with a chuckle and repeated the old age maxim of one man’s meat being another man’s poison.
His Excellency the president praised the efforts of the countries that sprang to the aid of the United States of America. He told of his amazement at the expertise of the Cuban doctors, the discipline of the Mexican soldiers and the calmness of the Egyptian rescue-workers. With what seemed like neighbourly banter, he praised Djibouti for its very large donation of $50,000 and used it as an example to other bigger and larger nations to also donate to this cause. He spoke of the temporary negative impact such a large donation will have on the economy of Djibouti, yet still praised that selfless country for answering the American calls for help.
President Yusuf is a very meticulous man. He made sure that he spoke about every country that made a donation to the United States of America. He marvelled at all their efforts. However, (and here, most people that are familiar with this great man would have anticipated the sting in the tail) President Yusuf said that none of these efforts were of that much benefit to the United States. Like the wise man he’s always been, he reminded everyone that America was the sole superpower in this world. That it was the richest, strongest and most organised. However, he also spoke about its naivety when it comes to natural disasters and the way to deal with them. In one of those sentences that are usually quoted and repeated by the masses when great men utter them, he said ‘America does not know everything, only Allah does’!
While everyone was lost in thought and looking up in awe at the great man, he amazed them further by suggesting the most obvious of ideas. With hindsight of course, we say such an idea is obvious. However, if his Excellency did not suggest it, it would have stayed in the recesses of his mind and the world would not have benefited from such great wisdom. Be that as it may, the idea is now out and President Yusuf’s name will, once again, enter the history books with yet another great thought.
This idea was so simple, so cunning and so ingenious that most present journalists agreed (as if lowly assent was needed) that Mr Yusuf was the wisest man alive.
Seeing the level of devastation and lawlessness in New Orleans reminded Mr Yusuf of his very own capital. He recounted his feelings as he watched those people shooting at the police on TV. He told of his anger as the looters were shown walking away with other people’s goods. He wiped a tear as he thought of the killing, rape and abuse.
All of a sudden, there was a twinkle in his eye and a naughty look in his face as he eulogised the abilities, organisation and greatness of the Somalis of the capital Mogadishu. He then stood up. All the journalists stood up with him. He looked far into the distance and started speaking. He was not speaking to the journalists anymore. He was not speaking to the Somalis and he was not speaking to himself. Mr Yusuf was talking directly to America. He told them that he’s not going to send them money. He’s not going to send them medical supplies. He’s not going to send them doctors or nurses. He told America in general and New Orleans in particular, that he’s going to send them ROAD BLOCK experts. There shall be no more looting, he said. Peace will return and New Orleans will be back again on its feet. Mr Yusuf then turned back to the awed journalists and told them that he’s sending 50,000 of these roadblock experts (along with their leaders).
He looked back into the distance and whispered words of encouragement to America before blessing them all and refusing to accept any thanks for his efforts. The journalists, the Somalis and everyone else wondered why other world leaders did not have a similar aura as this great man! Some worried that the Americans, after seeing the success of his idea, might decide to headhunt him.
In a long and elaborate speech delivered to the journalists of the world, the president sought to compare the tragedy besetting America today to the one that’s been crippling Somalia for the past fifteen years.
He started by talking about the chaos, death and despair. He talked about the need for strong leadership and steady resolve. He cleverly contrasted the floods engulfing New Orleans to the flood submerging Somalia (him). He concluded that mischievous comparison with a chuckle and repeated the old age maxim of one man’s meat being another man’s poison.
His Excellency the president praised the efforts of the countries that sprang to the aid of the United States of America. He told of his amazement at the expertise of the Cuban doctors, the discipline of the Mexican soldiers and the calmness of the Egyptian rescue-workers. With what seemed like neighbourly banter, he praised Djibouti for its very large donation of $50,000 and used it as an example to other bigger and larger nations to also donate to this cause. He spoke of the temporary negative impact such a large donation will have on the economy of Djibouti, yet still praised that selfless country for answering the American calls for help.
President Yusuf is a very meticulous man. He made sure that he spoke about every country that made a donation to the United States of America. He marvelled at all their efforts. However, (and here, most people that are familiar with this great man would have anticipated the sting in the tail) President Yusuf said that none of these efforts were of that much benefit to the United States. Like the wise man he’s always been, he reminded everyone that America was the sole superpower in this world. That it was the richest, strongest and most organised. However, he also spoke about its naivety when it comes to natural disasters and the way to deal with them. In one of those sentences that are usually quoted and repeated by the masses when great men utter them, he said ‘America does not know everything, only Allah does’!
While everyone was lost in thought and looking up in awe at the great man, he amazed them further by suggesting the most obvious of ideas. With hindsight of course, we say such an idea is obvious. However, if his Excellency did not suggest it, it would have stayed in the recesses of his mind and the world would not have benefited from such great wisdom. Be that as it may, the idea is now out and President Yusuf’s name will, once again, enter the history books with yet another great thought.
This idea was so simple, so cunning and so ingenious that most present journalists agreed (as if lowly assent was needed) that Mr Yusuf was the wisest man alive.
Seeing the level of devastation and lawlessness in New Orleans reminded Mr Yusuf of his very own capital. He recounted his feelings as he watched those people shooting at the police on TV. He told of his anger as the looters were shown walking away with other people’s goods. He wiped a tear as he thought of the killing, rape and abuse.
All of a sudden, there was a twinkle in his eye and a naughty look in his face as he eulogised the abilities, organisation and greatness of the Somalis of the capital Mogadishu. He then stood up. All the journalists stood up with him. He looked far into the distance and started speaking. He was not speaking to the journalists anymore. He was not speaking to the Somalis and he was not speaking to himself. Mr Yusuf was talking directly to America. He told them that he’s not going to send them money. He’s not going to send them medical supplies. He’s not going to send them doctors or nurses. He told America in general and New Orleans in particular, that he’s going to send them ROAD BLOCK experts. There shall be no more looting, he said. Peace will return and New Orleans will be back again on its feet. Mr Yusuf then turned back to the awed journalists and told them that he’s sending 50,000 of these roadblock experts (along with their leaders).
He looked back into the distance and whispered words of encouragement to America before blessing them all and refusing to accept any thanks for his efforts. The journalists, the Somalis and everyone else wondered why other world leaders did not have a similar aura as this great man! Some worried that the Americans, after seeing the success of his idea, might decide to headhunt him.
Aryaaa mando......Did this happen or are you saying our President wished the whole conversation where he took the stance? I was almost proud of him lol.
Posted by
SleepDepraved |
8:50 AM